Every other Friday night I make the journey with two stops.
First stop, to drop off my youngest son, Baily, to his Dad in the parking lot of one of our beautiful local wineries in the back country about 5 miles from my home. Second stop, to drop off my oldest son, Hunter, to his Dad at a large rest stop on the edge of the freeway about 20 minutes further down the road.
As I think of it now from afar, the entire scene could seem somewhat sad to an outsider… two divorces later, kid swapping … not an ideal situation for any of us, but … things change.
As I wait for Hunter’s dad every other weekend in this same lot, I am aware of just how many other families have the same child sharing arrangement … and the same drop off spot. Little ones toting suitcases, pillows, blankies and backpacks from Mom’s car to Dad’s car … from Dad’s car to Mom’s car.
In our evolutionary process as a species, trying to define what real relationship means to us … this is part of the cycle of things. We can clearly see the breakdown of traditional union … but what is just on the other side of this crumbling still remains an unrevealed mystery.
I choose to believe we are headed some place good; some place collective and freeing - all at the same time.
… I’ve always believed that it ’takes the whole tribe to raise the children’. Yes … always have … always will.
After I dropped off both boys this past Friday, I began my 30 minute drive home … solo. Ahhhhh, the bliss of it! Car to myself (rarely happens with 5 kids!), music loud (listening to something groovy like Maroon 5, I think) … I began to travel through the foothills on the way back to my house.
If you remember this past fall, much of Southern California where I live went up in flames during the wildfires. The media coverage was all-encompassing. People across the nation were glued to their televisions, mesmerized by stories of destruction, the loss of land, the displacement of people and wildlife.
And when it was over, and the infernos had been tamed, what was left behind were these foothills – barren and charred … with no signs of recognizable life. Not a pretty sight but, again, things change.
Then something wonderful happened ...
Last Friday night, as I drove through those once blackened mountains, expecting to see the familiar remnants of destruction that I’ve been passing every other Friday night since last September, an amazing sight caught my eye. The months had passed, and the rains had come, and the sun had shone, and the wind had blown …
And now, just like magic … life had begun anew. For a stretch of about 2 miles, those once dead hillsides were completely covered with the most spectacular blanket of violet colored wildflowers you could ever want to see!
It was beautiful. It was breathtaking. It was … proof of the cycle of things.
It was a reminder to me to be careful not to judge a situation, any situation, too quickly. What appears as a tragedy and a sorrow can be , and frequently is, just a yet unopened gift …
So, I know that these times we live in seem dark and difficult. Our systems appear to be breaking down. We war with one another. The fires of destruction look as if they are burning out of control.
But soon, when the flames die down, and the smoke clears, and the barren land has its time to heal … I have faith that the human race will also see hillside after hillside covered with a beautiful quilt of wildflowers … made up of all the colors of the rainbow.
Fear not! … it is only the cycle of things.
K
P.S. - Remember - gifts in disguise … are still ‘gifts’.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Sunday Happened
Well, it was my plan in this second posting to answer the most common questions typically asked of me as a single mom, raising five kids … three of whom are a set of triplets. (You know the questions … ‘oh, my – how have you done it alone?’, ‘when did you find out you were having triplets?’ and ‘were you on fertility drugs?’ Yadda, yadda, yadda.) I figured that would be a terrific segue into introducing my children to you one at a time for future reference. (Since I plan to share stories about each one of them that will make you laugh like crazy – though my kids, on the other hand, will surely plot my assassination for sharing blackmail material about them!) I was going to answer those kind of questions, but then … Sunday happened … and it took center stage in our lives. So, for at least one more day, those ‘typical’ questions will have to wait. Meanwhile, let me tell you about Sunday.
One of the triplets, my daughter Lynzee, had gone over to a friend’s house to spend the afternoon hanging out. Normal 15 year old girl stuff - nothing too unusual. It was about 4:30 in the afternoon, and I was in the kitchen starting to make dinner when my cell phone rang. It was my Mom (who also lives with us in her own little guest house) asking me to drop everything and come out in the front yard right away. Her sense of urgency was obvious, so I dropped what I was doing and headed for the driveway. When I got outside, I was momentarily paralyzed by what I saw. There, cross-legged on the sidewalk by the street, sat my beautiful daughter, sobbing hysterically. Clutched in her arms, an orange housecat, now dead – that had just been hit by a car. I dropped down behind her scooped them both into my embrace and rocked her. All I could say was, ‘I’m sorry, Honey’.
Apparently she was on her way down our street, being driven home by her friend’s dad, when right in front of them about a block from our house, a car hit this cat and kept right on going. The cat didn’t die instantly, and was struggling – so being the huge-hearted healer my little girl is, she screamed ‘stop’, opened the car door and bolted to the animal’s rescue before the automobile had even come to a complete halt. Not thinking of herself for a moment, she grabbed the kitty and held it to her … blood, fur and all … and repeated words of comfort to it over and over, until only a minute later it died in her arms. She brought it all the way home with her, slid out of the car and melted into a puddle at the end of our drive. Enter, the rest of the family.
Soon after I got out to her and tried my best to lend comfort, each of her other siblings came running to her side, arriving one by one. Everyone had their own immediate personal reaction to the image of this poor dead cat, but soon after, what I saw was a beautiful thing. Each of them also had their own reaction to the image of their sister’s vulnerability and pain. Once Lynzee placed the cat on the ground in front of her, she had arms around her, hands brushing through her hair, hands wiping away her tears and words of comfort from every brother and sister. In a house of 5 independent, strong-willed children, this does not happen a lot … but it happened Sunday.
Lynzee decided she wanted to bury the kitty in our backyard and have a small ceremony for him. That was all the family needed to hear. Hunter, Lynzee’s triplet brother, went straight to the garage, got a shovel , headed for the perfect spot and began to dig a hole. Baily, Lynzee’s eight year old brother went to the kitchen, grabbed a trash bag to cover the cat’s body with and a glass of water for his sister. Sydni, Lynzee’s older sister Sydni helped Lynzee change clothes and put her blood soaked shirt into a sink of warm soapy water to soak. And Dakota, Lynzee’s twin and best friend, stayed with her sister and helped her gather up candles and stones to use for the funeral.
At 5:30 p.m., we buried ‘Baby’ - together. (A name we gave him since we didn’t know what he had been called before.)
On a regular basis, in a house full of four teenagers and one little guy, I struggle at times to find that loving connection between my children amidst all the teasing, the drama, the practical jokes … the friction. On Sunday … it was there before my eyes, larger than life.
Baby Kitty, I hope you know what a gift you brought our family as you crossed over to the other side. The very last minute of your life impacted 7 others’. I will be forever grateful that … Sunday happened.
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P. S. – Don’t wait for Sunday to happen … go hug your kids now.
One of the triplets, my daughter Lynzee, had gone over to a friend’s house to spend the afternoon hanging out. Normal 15 year old girl stuff - nothing too unusual. It was about 4:30 in the afternoon, and I was in the kitchen starting to make dinner when my cell phone rang. It was my Mom (who also lives with us in her own little guest house) asking me to drop everything and come out in the front yard right away. Her sense of urgency was obvious, so I dropped what I was doing and headed for the driveway. When I got outside, I was momentarily paralyzed by what I saw. There, cross-legged on the sidewalk by the street, sat my beautiful daughter, sobbing hysterically. Clutched in her arms, an orange housecat, now dead – that had just been hit by a car. I dropped down behind her scooped them both into my embrace and rocked her. All I could say was, ‘I’m sorry, Honey’.
Apparently she was on her way down our street, being driven home by her friend’s dad, when right in front of them about a block from our house, a car hit this cat and kept right on going. The cat didn’t die instantly, and was struggling – so being the huge-hearted healer my little girl is, she screamed ‘stop’, opened the car door and bolted to the animal’s rescue before the automobile had even come to a complete halt. Not thinking of herself for a moment, she grabbed the kitty and held it to her … blood, fur and all … and repeated words of comfort to it over and over, until only a minute later it died in her arms. She brought it all the way home with her, slid out of the car and melted into a puddle at the end of our drive. Enter, the rest of the family.
Soon after I got out to her and tried my best to lend comfort, each of her other siblings came running to her side, arriving one by one. Everyone had their own immediate personal reaction to the image of this poor dead cat, but soon after, what I saw was a beautiful thing. Each of them also had their own reaction to the image of their sister’s vulnerability and pain. Once Lynzee placed the cat on the ground in front of her, she had arms around her, hands brushing through her hair, hands wiping away her tears and words of comfort from every brother and sister. In a house of 5 independent, strong-willed children, this does not happen a lot … but it happened Sunday.
Lynzee decided she wanted to bury the kitty in our backyard and have a small ceremony for him. That was all the family needed to hear. Hunter, Lynzee’s triplet brother, went straight to the garage, got a shovel , headed for the perfect spot and began to dig a hole. Baily, Lynzee’s eight year old brother went to the kitchen, grabbed a trash bag to cover the cat’s body with and a glass of water for his sister. Sydni, Lynzee’s older sister Sydni helped Lynzee change clothes and put her blood soaked shirt into a sink of warm soapy water to soak. And Dakota, Lynzee’s twin and best friend, stayed with her sister and helped her gather up candles and stones to use for the funeral.
At 5:30 p.m., we buried ‘Baby’ - together. (A name we gave him since we didn’t know what he had been called before.)
On a regular basis, in a house full of four teenagers and one little guy, I struggle at times to find that loving connection between my children amidst all the teasing, the drama, the practical jokes … the friction. On Sunday … it was there before my eyes, larger than life.
Baby Kitty, I hope you know what a gift you brought our family as you crossed over to the other side. The very last minute of your life impacted 7 others’. I will be forever grateful that … Sunday happened.
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P. S. – Don’t wait for Sunday to happen … go hug your kids now.
Use "The Good Stuff"
One day last week, I had my 8 year old in the bathtub – attempting to soak off the day’s dirt in preparation for school the next morning. I frequently tell him he is a ‘dirty, disgusting, smelly little kid’ – to which he always responds with a roll of his eyes, a giggle and an ‘am not!’ Then? He loses the battle and ends up in the tub, much to his dismay!
Baily is my baby. Baily is a lot of things … incredibly smart, extremely sensitive, frighteningly witty and wise beyond his years. But there is one thing Baily is not … Baily is not a good eater! Baily is more than picky … he is … well, he is … impossible! If I could go as long without caring about food as he does, I would put America’s Next Top Model to shame! Baily is a stinker about meals.
Now, since ‘creativity’ is the talent required most frequently (second only to ‘flexibility’ and the art of ‘distraction’) in effective parenting – I have developed some tricks of the trade, so to speak. And the one I pull out of my sleeve when I’m trying to coax Baily to eat something - anything - when he turns down the traditional offerings of breakfast, lunch or dinner is … the ‘special snack’!
Baily has never turned down a ‘special snack’!
Same food. Same purpose. Different delivery! (It’s all in the delivery, folks! Write that hint down for future reference … free of charge and on the house!)
So, back to the bathtub – it just happens to be one of Baily’s favorite places to eat a ‘special snack’. (In all honesty, I think it could be because this is one of the only places I can keep him immobilized long enough to get the job done!) And the other day, from underneath a pile of Mr. Bubble suds, he asked, “Hey Mom, can you make me a special snack?” Need I tell you that when Baily is volunteering to eat, the answer is always “YES!?”
I ran downstairs to the kitchen, gathered up my feast … some turkey lunchmeat, some string cheese, some strawberries … and I began to chop. One of the traits of the special snack is that it is always comprised of small pieces of finger foods! Makes it so much more fun that way!
It was about lunch time, so I decided I would join Baily for a tub-side picnic. (Some quality ‘Mommy and Me’ time was about to take place for sure.) I chopped and I sliced … I sliced and I chopped, until I had made enough for the both of us and then I went to open the cupboard where I keep my paper plates to grab a couple like I would normally do for a snack … but I stopped short!
Suddenly choirs began to play, angels began to sing and rays of light came down from the ceiling – as an entirely different cupboard beckoned me today … it was the ‘good stuff’ cupboard! Oh, we never go into that cupboard except on special occasions!!!
A smile came over my face as I opened the cabinet and retrieved two of my very best hand-painted china plates and took them down. Got that ‘rollercoaster’ feeling in my tummy. Felt a bit devilish. This was going to be good!
Quickly I arranged the food on the two plates and skipped up back up the stairs to present the goodies to my little man. Announcing my arrival before I even entered the bathroom, “Here comes your ‘special snack’!” … I could see the anticipation on Baily’s face.
Then I set down the fancy plates. His eyes got wide. His brow furled briefly. And finally the grin appeared from ear to ear. “Wow, Mom – we never use the good stuff, what’s the occasion?”
I reached out and roughed up his half-soggy hair. “You are, Baily,” I answered. “You are worth using the good stuff.”
The gratitude shined from his eyes. His face softened. “I Love you, Mom – you’re the best mom in the whole world,” he said.
Right then? I felt like it!
So today … find a reason to use the ‘good stuff’. Get it out, dust it off – and put it to good use! You are so worth it!
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. – You know, when you get yourself into the magical, feel good ‘flow’ … every day becomes … a ‘special occasion’!
Baily is my baby. Baily is a lot of things … incredibly smart, extremely sensitive, frighteningly witty and wise beyond his years. But there is one thing Baily is not … Baily is not a good eater! Baily is more than picky … he is … well, he is … impossible! If I could go as long without caring about food as he does, I would put America’s Next Top Model to shame! Baily is a stinker about meals.
Now, since ‘creativity’ is the talent required most frequently (second only to ‘flexibility’ and the art of ‘distraction’) in effective parenting – I have developed some tricks of the trade, so to speak. And the one I pull out of my sleeve when I’m trying to coax Baily to eat something - anything - when he turns down the traditional offerings of breakfast, lunch or dinner is … the ‘special snack’!
Baily has never turned down a ‘special snack’!
Same food. Same purpose. Different delivery! (It’s all in the delivery, folks! Write that hint down for future reference … free of charge and on the house!)
So, back to the bathtub – it just happens to be one of Baily’s favorite places to eat a ‘special snack’. (In all honesty, I think it could be because this is one of the only places I can keep him immobilized long enough to get the job done!) And the other day, from underneath a pile of Mr. Bubble suds, he asked, “Hey Mom, can you make me a special snack?” Need I tell you that when Baily is volunteering to eat, the answer is always “YES!?”
I ran downstairs to the kitchen, gathered up my feast … some turkey lunchmeat, some string cheese, some strawberries … and I began to chop. One of the traits of the special snack is that it is always comprised of small pieces of finger foods! Makes it so much more fun that way!
It was about lunch time, so I decided I would join Baily for a tub-side picnic. (Some quality ‘Mommy and Me’ time was about to take place for sure.) I chopped and I sliced … I sliced and I chopped, until I had made enough for the both of us and then I went to open the cupboard where I keep my paper plates to grab a couple like I would normally do for a snack … but I stopped short!
Suddenly choirs began to play, angels began to sing and rays of light came down from the ceiling – as an entirely different cupboard beckoned me today … it was the ‘good stuff’ cupboard! Oh, we never go into that cupboard except on special occasions!!!
A smile came over my face as I opened the cabinet and retrieved two of my very best hand-painted china plates and took them down. Got that ‘rollercoaster’ feeling in my tummy. Felt a bit devilish. This was going to be good!
Quickly I arranged the food on the two plates and skipped up back up the stairs to present the goodies to my little man. Announcing my arrival before I even entered the bathroom, “Here comes your ‘special snack’!” … I could see the anticipation on Baily’s face.
Then I set down the fancy plates. His eyes got wide. His brow furled briefly. And finally the grin appeared from ear to ear. “Wow, Mom – we never use the good stuff, what’s the occasion?”
I reached out and roughed up his half-soggy hair. “You are, Baily,” I answered. “You are worth using the good stuff.”
The gratitude shined from his eyes. His face softened. “I Love you, Mom – you’re the best mom in the whole world,” he said.
Right then? I felt like it!
So today … find a reason to use the ‘good stuff’. Get it out, dust it off – and put it to good use! You are so worth it!
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. – You know, when you get yourself into the magical, feel good ‘flow’ … every day becomes … a ‘special occasion’!
Saturday, January 2, 2010
The Secret
To me, there is a huge difference between ‘attracting’ something and ‘pursuing’ something. One will bring you great success … one will bring you great exhaustion.
(Perhaps that should be on a fortune cookie! Ah … my writing career branches out again!) ;-)
I spent a long time today talking with a fellow personal coach who is experiencing some difficulty taking his career to the next level … at least that’s what he thinks his trouble is.
He can tell me in detail about the all the ‘tasks’ that he needs to complete in order to grow professionally … promote his book, research marketing sources, create new products, find new clients, etc., etc., etc. … Blech! Sounds like a lot of hard W-O-R-K to me!!!
And he can tell me about all the roadblocks that are ‘preventing him from getting there’. Lack of technical skills, financial limitations, time limitations.
Well, me thinks me knows better!
Truth be told … (and I’m a big one on the truth … even when it stings a little!) the current vibration of energy this lovely man is putting forth in the world right now is about equal to that of ‘Eeyore’ the donkey from Winnie the Pooh!
Are you getting what I’m saying?
Would you want to be coached by Eeyore?
This coach has temporarily misplaced his passion underneath a pile of ‘shoulds’ and ‘to do’s’ … and his spirit is gathering dust.
And as I listened to him share all these ‘things’ that he thinks he needs to make happen in order for him to be happy, I couldn’t help but wonder about something …
Where in his lengthy agenda was there even one mention about the very reason he became a coach in the first place? … his love for all the people who needed his help?
His career had suddenly become … all about him.
Red flag. Red flag.
So I asked him a question …
If you took half of a day for yourself, what could you do that you haven't done in a long time, that would tickle you pink and knock your socks off?!
His response? …
Should know, but I don’t.
Next question …
If you keep choosing to put all your energy into the impossibility of the obstacles right in front of you, how are you ever going to make it past them and down the path to your ultimate destination?
His response? …
Never will. Even I know that.
Last, and probably most important question …
If you as a coach are selling happiness, peace and prosperity, how can you give to others what you do not have yourself?
… still waiting to hear the response to that one.
The prescription?
1) Two hours of time spent outside, barefoot in the dirt, sand, grass – whatever – spending some ‘play’ time. No agendas! (Just some time to get back in touch with his own passion.)
2) Shifting his focus back onto how to ATTRACT his clients, readers, followers ... not how to hunt them down. It doesn't matter where they're hanging out right now. When he puts out the right energy, THEY will find HIM! It’s simple magnetics.
If he listened, all I did was repeat to him … The Secret…
When you feel irresistible ... you become irresistible!
And the best part is, you don't have to be a coach to take this prescription!
Today, take some time to get back in touch with your own passion ... and as it grows ... you too will become irresistible to others!
Then let’s see where the path takes you! I guarantee it will lead you to amazing and wondrous places you haven’t even imagined yet! I think I will take my shoes off and join him!
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. – It’s not that I don’t adore Eeyore, it’s just that I’d rather watch him than follow him!
(Perhaps that should be on a fortune cookie! Ah … my writing career branches out again!) ;-)
I spent a long time today talking with a fellow personal coach who is experiencing some difficulty taking his career to the next level … at least that’s what he thinks his trouble is.
He can tell me in detail about the all the ‘tasks’ that he needs to complete in order to grow professionally … promote his book, research marketing sources, create new products, find new clients, etc., etc., etc. … Blech! Sounds like a lot of hard W-O-R-K to me!!!
And he can tell me about all the roadblocks that are ‘preventing him from getting there’. Lack of technical skills, financial limitations, time limitations.
Well, me thinks me knows better!
Truth be told … (and I’m a big one on the truth … even when it stings a little!) the current vibration of energy this lovely man is putting forth in the world right now is about equal to that of ‘Eeyore’ the donkey from Winnie the Pooh!
Are you getting what I’m saying?
Would you want to be coached by Eeyore?
This coach has temporarily misplaced his passion underneath a pile of ‘shoulds’ and ‘to do’s’ … and his spirit is gathering dust.
And as I listened to him share all these ‘things’ that he thinks he needs to make happen in order for him to be happy, I couldn’t help but wonder about something …
Where in his lengthy agenda was there even one mention about the very reason he became a coach in the first place? … his love for all the people who needed his help?
His career had suddenly become … all about him.
Red flag. Red flag.
So I asked him a question …
If you took half of a day for yourself, what could you do that you haven't done in a long time, that would tickle you pink and knock your socks off?!
His response? …
Should know, but I don’t.
Next question …
If you keep choosing to put all your energy into the impossibility of the obstacles right in front of you, how are you ever going to make it past them and down the path to your ultimate destination?
His response? …
Never will. Even I know that.
Last, and probably most important question …
If you as a coach are selling happiness, peace and prosperity, how can you give to others what you do not have yourself?
… still waiting to hear the response to that one.
The prescription?
1) Two hours of time spent outside, barefoot in the dirt, sand, grass – whatever – spending some ‘play’ time. No agendas! (Just some time to get back in touch with his own passion.)
2) Shifting his focus back onto how to ATTRACT his clients, readers, followers ... not how to hunt them down. It doesn't matter where they're hanging out right now. When he puts out the right energy, THEY will find HIM! It’s simple magnetics.
If he listened, all I did was repeat to him … The Secret…
When you feel irresistible ... you become irresistible!
And the best part is, you don't have to be a coach to take this prescription!
Today, take some time to get back in touch with your own passion ... and as it grows ... you too will become irresistible to others!
Then let’s see where the path takes you! I guarantee it will lead you to amazing and wondrous places you haven’t even imagined yet! I think I will take my shoes off and join him!
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. – It’s not that I don’t adore Eeyore, it’s just that I’d rather watch him than follow him!
The Power In Partnership
The Power of Partnership
Today, a very special friend of mine whom I met in the business arena came to me and ever so sweetly and powerfully pitched the idea of partnership. Initially, I was a bit floored … not because I wasn’t interested, (far from!) but because I simply wasn’t expecting the invitation. Unsolicited gifts are always the best … and a sure sign from the Universe that God is listening!
We spent about an hour having a very passionate talk about our goals and our dreams, but just barely braising the surface of hundreds … no maybe thousands … of ideas that we have the potential to create together as we begin a joint journey. Each of us has strengths and talents of our own. Individually, we are successful in our own right and can accomplish much, but together – our capabilities are virtually unlimited.
Just thinking about that humbles me and excites me … all at the same time!
It took my pal to remind me that just because Ican do things by myself … doesn’t mean I always have to! And what I can’t do alone … through the power of partnership … we can do magically together.
Reminds me of one of those great kid stories I keep promising you that will drive the idea home, so here you go … picture this …
When my triplets were toddlers, everything was done ‘boot camp’ style. Feed, feed, feed – diaper, diaper, diaper … diaper, diaper, diaper … diaper, diaper … oh, sorry – got stuck for a moment in the old routine! (At the high point, I was changing 126 diapers a week, give or take 3 or 4!) Anyhow – to save time and for the sake of my sanity, I would always give them a bath together too.
(Yes! I have tons of naked blackmail photos that I wield over their teenage heads on a regular basis from this era!)
Once they got clean … and were thoroughly finished making a soggy mess of the bathroom floor … I would scoop each one out, wrap them lovingly in a fluffy towel and herd them into their bedroom for pajamas, pajamas, pajamas! =)
One night I will never forget – I had just dried everyone off and was collecting the wet towels before getting them ready for bed. The laundry room was only one doorway down the hall. I watched 3 little baby bottoms running around the bedroom, busy and giggling and thought, in a moment of what I see now in retrospect as maternal insanity , ’I can make it’!!!
Faster than light I darted out of the bedroom into the laundry room, opened the hamper lid, stuffed the towels inside, closed it again and returned to their bedroom.
Note to self … BIG MISTAKE!!!!
What I walked back into was a site I will never forget. One dresser drawer being held open by Lynzee. One grinning face on Hunter, who had just given his sister a two-handed hike. And Dakota … standing in all her naked glory on top of the dresser … lampshade in one hand … unscrewing the lightbulb with the other! Chinese acrobats? No. Partnership? You bet!
What one cannot do alone, two can do easily … and three can do spectacularly! I’ve see the living proof!
So, I challenge you today … pick something BIG you want to do in your life, but don’t think you can by yourself… (Don’t stop at lightbulbs … stretch with me here, okay?) Approach someone, offer the idea of partnership … and see what magic occurs next.
I can almost promise you that it will be an illuminating experience for both of you! (Sorry, I couldn’t resist!!!)
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. – My pal says “1+1=11”. He says he stole that saying from someone … and I like it so I’m stealing it from him. If you like it, feel free to steal it from me. Psssst … pass it on!
Today, a very special friend of mine whom I met in the business arena came to me and ever so sweetly and powerfully pitched the idea of partnership. Initially, I was a bit floored … not because I wasn’t interested, (far from!) but because I simply wasn’t expecting the invitation. Unsolicited gifts are always the best … and a sure sign from the Universe that God is listening!
We spent about an hour having a very passionate talk about our goals and our dreams, but just barely braising the surface of hundreds … no maybe thousands … of ideas that we have the potential to create together as we begin a joint journey. Each of us has strengths and talents of our own. Individually, we are successful in our own right and can accomplish much, but together – our capabilities are virtually unlimited.
Just thinking about that humbles me and excites me … all at the same time!
It took my pal to remind me that just because Ican do things by myself … doesn’t mean I always have to! And what I can’t do alone … through the power of partnership … we can do magically together.
Reminds me of one of those great kid stories I keep promising you that will drive the idea home, so here you go … picture this …
When my triplets were toddlers, everything was done ‘boot camp’ style. Feed, feed, feed – diaper, diaper, diaper … diaper, diaper, diaper … diaper, diaper … oh, sorry – got stuck for a moment in the old routine! (At the high point, I was changing 126 diapers a week, give or take 3 or 4!) Anyhow – to save time and for the sake of my sanity, I would always give them a bath together too.
(Yes! I have tons of naked blackmail photos that I wield over their teenage heads on a regular basis from this era!)
Once they got clean … and were thoroughly finished making a soggy mess of the bathroom floor … I would scoop each one out, wrap them lovingly in a fluffy towel and herd them into their bedroom for pajamas, pajamas, pajamas! =)
One night I will never forget – I had just dried everyone off and was collecting the wet towels before getting them ready for bed. The laundry room was only one doorway down the hall. I watched 3 little baby bottoms running around the bedroom, busy and giggling and thought, in a moment of what I see now in retrospect as maternal insanity , ’I can make it’!!!
Faster than light I darted out of the bedroom into the laundry room, opened the hamper lid, stuffed the towels inside, closed it again and returned to their bedroom.
Note to self … BIG MISTAKE!!!!
What I walked back into was a site I will never forget. One dresser drawer being held open by Lynzee. One grinning face on Hunter, who had just given his sister a two-handed hike. And Dakota … standing in all her naked glory on top of the dresser … lampshade in one hand … unscrewing the lightbulb with the other! Chinese acrobats? No. Partnership? You bet!
What one cannot do alone, two can do easily … and three can do spectacularly! I’ve see the living proof!
So, I challenge you today … pick something BIG you want to do in your life, but don’t think you can by yourself… (Don’t stop at lightbulbs … stretch with me here, okay?) Approach someone, offer the idea of partnership … and see what magic occurs next.
I can almost promise you that it will be an illuminating experience for both of you! (Sorry, I couldn’t resist!!!)
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. – My pal says “1+1=11”. He says he stole that saying from someone … and I like it so I’m stealing it from him. If you like it, feel free to steal it from me. Psssst … pass it on!
Good Things Come In Threes
Good Things Come In Threes!
They say good things come in threes … and I can certainly attest to the truth of that statement! Mine are a set of triplets named Dakota, Lynzee and Hunter.
Now, truth be told, I do have five children all together, but I’ve come to accept that it is a natural reaction when others find out about the fact that I have triplets, for curiosity to take over and ten burning questions seem to always come blurting out spontaneously. I will happily answer them for you today, but this brings to mind, an amusing memory.
I specifically remember one trip we took to the San Diego Zoo when the babies were about a year old. (Now, as a disclaimer, I have to admit we were somewhat of a spectacle anywhere we went back in those days. Baby stroller the size of a Cadillac – not one, not two, but three seats in a row, front to back. Three babbling little beings … so friendly … and such total hams!!! ) On this day, though - it seemed we were one of the main attractions!
Dakota and Lynzee are identical twins, so they were a matched pair. Hunter was the man of the bunch, content to let his sisters take center stage much of the time. Hmmm … even though they’re almost 16 years old now, not much has changed! I’m thinking that’s just because there’s no way to get a word in edgewise around two teenaged drama queens!! Poor guy!
On the day in question, we entered the front gates of the zoo like everyone else, but it wasn’t long until we’d been discovered. Going incognito is out when you’re toting that many bodies, so what do you do? Grin and bear it. Within moments we were literally surrounded by a crowd of people.
People began pointing and touching and oooing and awing – and yes, asking those ten dreaded questions that I answered almost daily. At this point I remember my Mom leaning over to me and saying, Kim – I’m going to make you up a flyer … “Ten things you want to know about my triplets” and we will hang then in a folder off the back of the stroller! Then, when you get mobbed, you can just silently hand them out and keep walking! (Mom wasn’t too indulgent that day!)
Anyhow, I think the icing on the cake was when a large group of Japanese businessmen (obviously tourists) asked (by way of charades … I don’t speak Japanese!) if they could take a photograph with us to take back to their homeland. It was at that particular moment, as we posed for … the entire country of Japan … that I recall thinking , ‘is this as unusual as people seem to think it is?’
So now, in answer to that one question and the other top nine … I give you my ‘triplet trivia’!
1) Q - How common is it to have triplets?
A- Approximately 1 in 8,100.
2) Q – Were you taking fertility medication?
A – Nope, just lucky, I guess. They happened spontaneously!
3) Q – Do triplets run in your family?
A – Ready for a good laugh? I’m an only child!!
4) Q -How early did you know you were having triplets?
A – at about 8 weeks when I was waking up at midnight craving roast beef sandwiches!
5) Q- Are they identical or fraternal?
A- The girls are identical (one egg that split – they were in the same sack). My son was fraternal. Identicals must be the same sex.
6) Q - How many weeks did you make it before delivering?
A – 34 ½!
7) Q – Did you have them naturally?
A – Had to have a C-Section. The doctors won’t even let you attempt natural birth with anything more than twins!
8) Q – Did you have to go on bed rest or in the hospital early?
A – Nope – woke up the morning of my scheduled amniocentesis in labor at 4 a.m. – delivered the next morning.
9) Q – How many minutes apart were they born?
A – One! 9:15 a.m., 9:16 a.m., and 9:17 a.m. (and don’ t think that one minute in the birth order doesn’t make a difference to them … the oldest holds that 60 seconds over the others’ heads on a daily basis!)
10) Q – How much did they weigh?
A – 3 lbs. 10 oz., 3 lbs. 7 oz. and 2lbs. 14 oz. … and the boy was the smallest!
A few other interesting facts?
I was one of three women pregnant with spontaneous triplets … all due within 2 weeks of one another at our hospital. The hospital hadn’t had a set of triplets born there in over 11 years!
No – you do not sleep for the first 6 months when you have triplets!! (Keep in mind that I had a 2 year old when they were born!)
Only got the girls mixed up one time – tried to feed the same baby twice! (Give me a break, I was tired!!!
Okay, there you go … now you know about my triplets, and a little more about me. I have such stories about these maniacs!!! Cheap entertainment! Trust me … the best is yet to come!
So thought for the day today? Good things come in threes! Don’t doubt it … even if you think the odds are against you!!!
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P. S. – Hey, start counting your ‘good things’ right now … you could be to three before you know it!!!
They say good things come in threes … and I can certainly attest to the truth of that statement! Mine are a set of triplets named Dakota, Lynzee and Hunter.
Now, truth be told, I do have five children all together, but I’ve come to accept that it is a natural reaction when others find out about the fact that I have triplets, for curiosity to take over and ten burning questions seem to always come blurting out spontaneously. I will happily answer them for you today, but this brings to mind, an amusing memory.
I specifically remember one trip we took to the San Diego Zoo when the babies were about a year old. (Now, as a disclaimer, I have to admit we were somewhat of a spectacle anywhere we went back in those days. Baby stroller the size of a Cadillac – not one, not two, but three seats in a row, front to back. Three babbling little beings … so friendly … and such total hams!!! ) On this day, though - it seemed we were one of the main attractions!
Dakota and Lynzee are identical twins, so they were a matched pair. Hunter was the man of the bunch, content to let his sisters take center stage much of the time. Hmmm … even though they’re almost 16 years old now, not much has changed! I’m thinking that’s just because there’s no way to get a word in edgewise around two teenaged drama queens!! Poor guy!
On the day in question, we entered the front gates of the zoo like everyone else, but it wasn’t long until we’d been discovered. Going incognito is out when you’re toting that many bodies, so what do you do? Grin and bear it. Within moments we were literally surrounded by a crowd of people.
People began pointing and touching and oooing and awing – and yes, asking those ten dreaded questions that I answered almost daily. At this point I remember my Mom leaning over to me and saying, Kim – I’m going to make you up a flyer … “Ten things you want to know about my triplets” and we will hang then in a folder off the back of the stroller! Then, when you get mobbed, you can just silently hand them out and keep walking! (Mom wasn’t too indulgent that day!)
Anyhow, I think the icing on the cake was when a large group of Japanese businessmen (obviously tourists) asked (by way of charades … I don’t speak Japanese!) if they could take a photograph with us to take back to their homeland. It was at that particular moment, as we posed for … the entire country of Japan … that I recall thinking , ‘is this as unusual as people seem to think it is?’
So now, in answer to that one question and the other top nine … I give you my ‘triplet trivia’!
1) Q - How common is it to have triplets?
A- Approximately 1 in 8,100.
2) Q – Were you taking fertility medication?
A – Nope, just lucky, I guess. They happened spontaneously!
3) Q – Do triplets run in your family?
A – Ready for a good laugh? I’m an only child!!
4) Q -How early did you know you were having triplets?
A – at about 8 weeks when I was waking up at midnight craving roast beef sandwiches!
5) Q- Are they identical or fraternal?
A- The girls are identical (one egg that split – they were in the same sack). My son was fraternal. Identicals must be the same sex.
6) Q - How many weeks did you make it before delivering?
A – 34 ½!
7) Q – Did you have them naturally?
A – Had to have a C-Section. The doctors won’t even let you attempt natural birth with anything more than twins!
8) Q – Did you have to go on bed rest or in the hospital early?
A – Nope – woke up the morning of my scheduled amniocentesis in labor at 4 a.m. – delivered the next morning.
9) Q – How many minutes apart were they born?
A – One! 9:15 a.m., 9:16 a.m., and 9:17 a.m. (and don’ t think that one minute in the birth order doesn’t make a difference to them … the oldest holds that 60 seconds over the others’ heads on a daily basis!)
10) Q – How much did they weigh?
A – 3 lbs. 10 oz., 3 lbs. 7 oz. and 2lbs. 14 oz. … and the boy was the smallest!
A few other interesting facts?
I was one of three women pregnant with spontaneous triplets … all due within 2 weeks of one another at our hospital. The hospital hadn’t had a set of triplets born there in over 11 years!
No – you do not sleep for the first 6 months when you have triplets!! (Keep in mind that I had a 2 year old when they were born!)
Only got the girls mixed up one time – tried to feed the same baby twice! (Give me a break, I was tired!!!
Okay, there you go … now you know about my triplets, and a little more about me. I have such stories about these maniacs!!! Cheap entertainment! Trust me … the best is yet to come!
So thought for the day today? Good things come in threes! Don’t doubt it … even if you think the odds are against you!!!
Until tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P. S. – Hey, start counting your ‘good things’ right now … you could be to three before you know it!!!
When You're Not Watching
My oldest daughter, 18 and about to graduate from high school (someone pass me a tissue!), pleasantly surprised me the other day.
Those of you who have teenagers have probably already traveled down the same road I have over the past two years. Once your child has a car, you never seem to see them anymore. In my house, we joke that Sydni’s car is her ‘apartment on wheels’! She only stops in to graze from the fridge, throw in a load of laundry, take a quick shower and sleep … if she can stay still long enough.
At first it bothered me that she was never, ever home to hang out with Dear Old Mom like she had in the past. But then, in my infinite wisdom, I reframed something. Teenagers with cars are God’s way of preparing Moms and Dads for the inevitable ‘move out’. It just breaks you in gently!
Anyhow, it was about 10:30 a.m. last Saturday and Sydni called me from her cell phone. She was at the carwash. “Mom,” she said, “can I ask you a question?”
Secretly smiling to myself that we may have reached the age where Mom once again knows something … anything … I answered humbly. “Sure, Sweetie – what?”
“Well, I am parked in the lot about ready to get into the long line here at the carwash. I am cleaning out all the trash and stuff from my car and guess what I found?”
My mind flashes me several visuals … some amusing, some not!
“What did you find?” Mom asks, nervously.
“I found thirty dollars! It was underneath the floor mat in the passenger seat of my car by the center console.”
“Great!” I replied, “What’s the question?”
“Well, should I keep it? I mean, I don’t remember losing $30.00 recently, and you know I drive everyone around in my car – what if it belongs to one of my friends … should I call all my friends and ask them if they lost money? It’s probably been in here for a long time.”
I smiled. Thought to myself, ‘Ah, you’ve done good, Mom! Daughter number one is an honest cookie!’
Now what was quite timely here was that just the night before, Sydni and I had a long discussion about how she is always the one who is expected to drive everyone in her group everywhere they go. Her friends look to her for taxi service – partially because she is sweet and kind and safe – and partially because they are not nearly as motivated to work and make money as she is. They never just offer to pay for gas.
“Sydni,” I said, “Trust me when I tell you that when you ask a typical group of teenagers ‘Who lost thirty bucks?’ … they all lost thirty bucks! Honey, that money was a gift from the Universe for being generous and caring … and for carting around every kid in our town when they don’t have a way home from school.”
“Are you sure, Mom? What if someone comes to me next week and says they’re missing money?”
“Then give it back, Syd. But if not … it’s from heaven … and just for you! Now go tell them you want the super deluxe wash, buy yourself an iced tea and a magazine, find a sunny corner out on the patio, and wait for your car to be done – and today, it’s on God!”
And … that’s exactly what she did.
After I hung up the phone, I spent a minute in gratitude. And one thought filled my head … and my heart …
It’s what they do when you’re not looking that counts.
Until Tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. - As their character is being shaped, it's not so much what the parent says, but what the children see them do that matters.
Those of you who have teenagers have probably already traveled down the same road I have over the past two years. Once your child has a car, you never seem to see them anymore. In my house, we joke that Sydni’s car is her ‘apartment on wheels’! She only stops in to graze from the fridge, throw in a load of laundry, take a quick shower and sleep … if she can stay still long enough.
At first it bothered me that she was never, ever home to hang out with Dear Old Mom like she had in the past. But then, in my infinite wisdom, I reframed something. Teenagers with cars are God’s way of preparing Moms and Dads for the inevitable ‘move out’. It just breaks you in gently!
Anyhow, it was about 10:30 a.m. last Saturday and Sydni called me from her cell phone. She was at the carwash. “Mom,” she said, “can I ask you a question?”
Secretly smiling to myself that we may have reached the age where Mom once again knows something … anything … I answered humbly. “Sure, Sweetie – what?”
“Well, I am parked in the lot about ready to get into the long line here at the carwash. I am cleaning out all the trash and stuff from my car and guess what I found?”
My mind flashes me several visuals … some amusing, some not!
“What did you find?” Mom asks, nervously.
“I found thirty dollars! It was underneath the floor mat in the passenger seat of my car by the center console.”
“Great!” I replied, “What’s the question?”
“Well, should I keep it? I mean, I don’t remember losing $30.00 recently, and you know I drive everyone around in my car – what if it belongs to one of my friends … should I call all my friends and ask them if they lost money? It’s probably been in here for a long time.”
I smiled. Thought to myself, ‘Ah, you’ve done good, Mom! Daughter number one is an honest cookie!’
Now what was quite timely here was that just the night before, Sydni and I had a long discussion about how she is always the one who is expected to drive everyone in her group everywhere they go. Her friends look to her for taxi service – partially because she is sweet and kind and safe – and partially because they are not nearly as motivated to work and make money as she is. They never just offer to pay for gas.
“Sydni,” I said, “Trust me when I tell you that when you ask a typical group of teenagers ‘Who lost thirty bucks?’ … they all lost thirty bucks! Honey, that money was a gift from the Universe for being generous and caring … and for carting around every kid in our town when they don’t have a way home from school.”
“Are you sure, Mom? What if someone comes to me next week and says they’re missing money?”
“Then give it back, Syd. But if not … it’s from heaven … and just for you! Now go tell them you want the super deluxe wash, buy yourself an iced tea and a magazine, find a sunny corner out on the patio, and wait for your car to be done – and today, it’s on God!”
And … that’s exactly what she did.
After I hung up the phone, I spent a minute in gratitude. And one thought filled my head … and my heart …
It’s what they do when you’re not looking that counts.
Until Tomorrow …
Hugs (from the closet),
KimbraLee =)
P.S. - As their character is being shaped, it's not so much what the parent says, but what the children see them do that matters.
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