Once Upon A Time

Once upon a time, there were men and there were women.

The men? They were strong and empowered and confident. They were husbands, fathers, providers. Using every bit of their mind, their senses, their masculinity … they went out into the wild, stalked the proverbial meal - secured it and with pride, brought it home. And … life was good.

The women? They were warm and inviting and nurturing. They were mothers, wives, healers. Using every bit of their heart, their compassion, their femininity … they set the tone of the homefront – created and practiced tradition, birthed and nourished the children, spilled love over, appreciated and gave love to their men. And … life was good.

There was an understanding. A rightness of things. A balance. And everyone clearly knew their roles.

After many years, and as all things flow with time, some men became confused and their vision became blurred. They mistakenly began to believe that, because their muscles and their strength worked so well out in the wild, they must surely be superior to the woman’s abilities and attributes in every situation… and they started to lose sight of the glory of the female. Some of them even began to share this belief with their women and attempted to suppress their spirits.

This was not a good turning of things for women.

Around this same time, and as all things flow with time, some women became confused and their courage began to waiver. They mistakenly began to doubt that, living fully in the purpose of championing a family, was enough evidence of their inner strength … and they started to discreetly and collectively gather their unexpressed fear of being weak and unworthy to launch a protest against their perceived submission.

This was not a good turning of things for men.

So, one day – on the day of a very big hunt – as the men were readying themselves to go out into the wilderness and tame beasts and be men … out of the brush came women – an entire group of women. They looked like women, they sounded like women, they smelled like women, but they did not act like women.

The men were rightfully unsettled and nervous.

“Why do you come here now? Can’t you see that we are preparing for the big hunt? It will be hard work, physically challenging and dangerous. It is man’s work to kill and provide for the family,” said the spokesman for the men.

“Ha … foolish man,” replied the speaker for the women, “You think that your muscles and your size make you superior and the only ones who can go on the big hunt. But like you, we have weapons to help us. You think that women cannot do what you can do. But we are here to show you … we can … and we will.”

And with that, the women charged off into the wilderness to bring back sustenance for their families.

The men, not sure what to do while the women were on their own hunt, stumbled around a bit and mumbled amongst themselves.

“If the women will now hunt, then what shall be our role? Shall we hunt anyway and duplicate their efforts? And if we do, both women and men hunting at the same time, then who shall watch over the children while we are both out in the wilderness? And who shall be in the home to welcome us at the end of the day when the hunt is over?”

No satisfactory answers were to be had ... No satisfactory words were spoken.

Having no other purpose in their hearts, the men went back to their homes to be with their children and wait. They fed them, bathed them, taught them and played with them. It was not as easy as they had always imagined. The men were surprised and they were tired.

At the end of the day, the men once again gathered at the edge of the wilderness to see how the women’s hunt went. When the women finally returned, they brought back with them their killings – some large and some small. It was not as easy as they had always imagined. The women were surprised and they were tired.

“We have gone on the great hunt … and we have proven what we can do. We can do your job, men –“

The men looked at the women and replied, “And while you were gone, we cared for our homes and our children. We too can do your job, women –“

If but three words had been spoken on that day – the course of history could have been altered and the balance could have been maintained, but neither the women nor the men were willing to say them. No one spoke the healing words … “I honor you”.

So after each couple returned home in silence and sat at their dinner table, eating with their family, they looked upon each other at opposite ends of the table.

They looked different to one another than they had in the past. The men did not seem as virile and indestructable as they had before. The women did not seem as delicate and mysterious as they had before. And some of the magic of chemistry had begun to break down.

There was an uneasiness. A confusion. And no one clearly knew their roles.

This was not a good turning of things for men … or for women.


And yes, it’s just my unsolicited opinion.

Certainly, the quest for mutual respect and appreciation is an honorable thing … and though its original intentions were well meaning, where feminism missed the mark was that it became far more of a stand against oppression than a stand for equal regard.

As men and women, at what expense have we gained one another’s nod of conceit?

I believe that men and women everywhere act out the day of the big hunt over and over out of a sense of obligation, rather than a sense of inspiration.

I know many tired women.
I know many displaced men.
I know many lonely children.


I know how to fix it. I know three words that would begin to make it better – for all of us.


I’m not afraid … I’ll go first.

I Honor You.


Until Tomorrow …

Hugs (from the closet),

KimbraLee =)

P.S. – Women … we don’t really need to give up our rights. Perhaps we just need to give up our need to be right.